Dear diary, maybe I’m poly after all...

You know… the more I experience life, the more I am coming to realize that one person will never be able to fulfil my sexual needs… even if I feel they could fulfil all my emotional needs (perhaps I’m a poly-hybrid?). Even if I am open to an emotionally monogamous relationship I still want to retain freedom to get fucked when/how I want.

I recently went through a brief mono(ish) relationship and noticed that my sexual satisfaction was entirely dependent on whether he was available or even “in the mood” to have sex when he did come over. That didn’t work for me. Especially because when we did experiment with sex he wasn’t into the same things I wanted to try (face fucking) and I felt stuck without any way to fulfil this deep rooted sexual fantasy and many others.

I know everyone does poly a bit differently and I will be no different. I’m starting to learn what I can handle/enjoy (i.e. I enjoy knowing and hearing about their sexual escapades and things that bring them joy) and what “urks” me (i.e. hearing in-depth about a partners other partner(s) and the inner workings of their dynamics during “our time”). It is going to be a learning curve for me to figure out how I “fit” exactly in poly world… or if I fit at all.

Lasting thought: I don’t put all my investments in one stock… why would I put all my sexual investments in one cock?

~TorontoUnicorn